Well, this is my first ever entry on a blog and I do hope that I don't bore you all to death with the taudry every day tales of my life as a family lawyer and the client's I see (all names have been changed to protect the innocent!).
Today I'm not at work, I'm off sick and daytime tv is driving me crazy! I can't watch Jeremy Kyle - well, that's just like watching client's on tv. And why is every other advert one for debts and/or credit. Do yourself a favour don't get a credit card in the first place - if you can't afford it, you can't have it - its as simple as that. Ooh, preachey moment over!
My secretary has bothered me this morning 5 times so far - I can't even be ill in peace. So, I'm told work is 'piling up', well do some then, I almost shout down the phone. But she's too concerned about the 'scrape' she's having tomorrow at the hospital. Secretary H is then off for the rest of the week to recover from said scrape. I think the actual terminology for 'scrape' is D & C - scrape is such a horrible word - sounds like something to do with sheep or what you try to do when you tread in dog shit.
On the subject of dog shit, is it just me or does anyone else out there scrape the dog poo off the sole of the shoe with the only implement of any use - a butter knife? Gets into all the crevases ~perfect. Still, you just don't seem to tread in as much poo these days compared with about 10/15 years ago. Thank god for those little orange nappy sacks.
I digress, where was I, oh yes, secretary H. The 1st conversation went like this:-
'just ringing to check whether you are coming in today'
'I thought it would have been self evident that I wasn't since I am always the first in the office and clearly wasn't this morning was I?
'I thought you might have got stuck on the motorway'
'but you're ringing my home number ,no, I'm just not coming in, but you can ring me in the case of a dire emergency as necessary'. I stressed 'only in an emergency'
Needless to say the next 4 calls from secretary H are non-emergencies, the last call being that she is hoping not to call me again and reminding me that she won't see me for the rest of the week. Why? I ask, then I am reminded about the dreaded 'scrape'. I wish her all the best and tell her that I hope its a successful scrape. If successful secretary H will no longer have lengthy heavy periods which will be a good thing - not only for her but also for me because I can tell you now having a secretary who is on her period for 80% of the month is not a good experience. Secretary H will then only have the one remaining medical dilemma - that of her leaking bladder. Unfortunately my poor secretary's room has the aroma of an old peoples home. But more of that in the future.
See you tomorrow 